No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
