my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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