is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
They took my balls.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
