I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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