i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
