um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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