As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
