You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
is that a dick in a sweater?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
