I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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