Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
