I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
