It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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