I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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