just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
