wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
