My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
he puts the penis in happiness.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
