operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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