If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
