I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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