awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
