if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
