Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
