what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm at about main and main street
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
