Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
