oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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