so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
