I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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