and i looked up. we had an audience...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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