You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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