Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
