it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
