awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
