Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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