it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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