Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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