so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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