I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
