What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
