Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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