its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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