maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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