Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
