It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
