Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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