he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
All the doctor said was why
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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