Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Randomize
