my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Randomize
