It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
