He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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