If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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